Gauging chemistry with another person is difficult. You may think you’ve had a great conversation on a date, only to find out that the other person didn’t feel the spark. This can also happen in reverse. It’s also possible that you’re simply not sure, and that’s where a little simple, deductive reasoning comes in.
1. Listen to Yourself as an Outsider
Marie Claire advises listening to yourself and taking an objective look at how you describe the person you’ve gone on a date with. If you’re explaining away potential problems or making excuses for shortcomings, then you know that it’s time to take a step back. Trying to force a connection won’t help matter, and will only waste your time, as well as the other person’s.
2. Listen to What’s Being Said, and Not What You Want to Hear
Everyone has certain qualities in a person they’re looking for. However, when you’re on a date, be certain that you’re listening openly to the other person, rather than looking for what you want to hear. It seems obvious, but it’s a pitfall that people frequently fall into because everyone wants to meet a good match. In order to establish true, genuine chemistry, though, the connection has to be real and viable.
3. You Want to Spend Time with Them
It may seem obvious, but sometimes people get caught up in how great someone seems on paper, and don’t consider their actual feelings. For example, you might meet someone who’s accomplished, poised, and attractive, and seems like a true catch. However, if you simply can’t see yourself wanting to spend more time with them as a person, it doesn’t matter what their background or appearance is. That special urge to see someone again is what love connections are all about.
If you’re trying to find that special someone, get help from a Boston dating coach.
